Episode 1: Broken
We open with a character we don’t know or care about who goes about his hipster business in modern-day New York. A post card from Storybrooke, ME, appears in his window with one word scrawled on the back: Broken.

You guys are going to be SO SURPRISED about who this is.
We next go to some more characters we don’t know or care about in Fairy Tale Land: A prince or something cuts through some brier to get to a sleeping beauty, whom he wakes with a kiss–although the ensuing magical wave does not compare to the one that rolled off Snow White when Charming revived her. Following on his heels is an Asian warrior with a face covering so that we don’t know it’s Mulan yet, but we all have seen the Internet, so we all know it’s Mulan.
Back in ME, a drawn-out reunion scene occurs among the townspeople as they all realize how they’re related and love each other, etc. This goes on for what seems like a long time, with Prince Charming and Snow White embracing a lot and embracing Emma and embracing Henry. Then they get to the inevitable discussion: What to do with The Evil Queen. A bunch of townspeople want to kill her (can’t blame them). They debate this for a while; then Henry doesn’t want that to happen because “she’s still my mom.” What he means by this, of course, is that she’s still the best character in the show, and nobody would watch it if they killed her off. Charming gives the best reason to stop the townspeople from storming her door (other than her being the best character): She might use magic to kill everybody.
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Tags: classic country in passing, fabulous clothes, fairy tale land, hipsters, Mulan, Once Upon a Time, Secret Shady Evil Queen Stuff, Secret Shady Rumplestiltskin Stuff