Regular Poem: Eulogy

13 Mar

I guess it’s holding water.

I’d never heard the phrase
before
but it resonated–

something about the moon

always resonates.
And I stare for a long time
at the crescent
shining
muted by fog–
a perfect funeral eve.

It seems like a phrase
she would’ve taught me
like shit fire
or S.O.B.
(it took me years to figure out what the letters stood for)
or warsh
or culottes
or that particular way she breathily inflected well to express so much
(said aghast or elated or flummoxed)–
each old-timey and well-worn and well-used.

She taught me how to translate granny talk
and decipher cursive
(script or writing rather than print)
and play cards
and lose at cards gracefully
and go to church every Sunday even though nobody else is going with you
and sit in a pew respectfully
and chit chat
and offer people food while you chit chat
and call the city to complain about neglected city maintenance
and work a job nobody cares about
and just be quiet and still.

I’ve never written poetry about her–
only prose to her
and not often enough–
just the daily miseries
scrawled out
in truncated sentences
in scratchy penmanship
with the date at the top
and at least a paragraph about the weather
the way she taught me.

I regret
not writing more often
not writing more profusely
not writing more deeply.

I should buy
a small yellow legal pad
and write to everyone
in her honor.

I had a dream once
in which a man was flirting with me,
and he said,
“You look like the kind of girl
who never runs out of stamps.”
It’s true, of course.
And I know exactly where I learned that.

She had lived for so long,
and the memory of her
is so interlaced in my personality
that I keep seeing things
just out of the corner of my eye
about myself that are so much
her.

The moon and I
are holding water
or maybe treading water.
Water is involved somehow
probably being drunk
out of a Quik Trip mug from circa 1983.

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2 Responses to “Regular Poem: Eulogy”

  1. Silver Screenings 13 March 2016 at 8:57 AM #

    This is profoundly sad and witty. (I loved the line about looking like a girl who never runs out of stamps! I think this is going to be my new criteria for evaluating the new people I meet.)

    Beautifully done.

    • TheBestofAlexandra 13 March 2016 at 9:59 AM #

      If someone were to describe me, I don’t think “a profoundly sad and witty girl who never runs out of stamps” would be too far off. 🙂 And I’ve never evaluated others on this basis. Maybe I should start. Ha!

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