Regular Poem: Personality tests

7 Apr

Personality tests
always rely on such
subjective data.

How can a brain
objectively
process, sift through,
assemble and disassemble
all its conflicting
information–
all jumbled and filtered through
emotions and philosophies and half-forgotten memories–
to answer all the questions
personality tests
ask?

A brain can’t
stop itself
and stand
outside itself
with its hood open and
jam a long screwdriver between a belt and a pulley,
poke at a coupling with a ballpoint pen from its breast pocket,
shine its flashlight on the radiator fluid reserve tank.

A brain can’t
open itself at its desk
and take a highlighter
to each neural page,
underline tricky or important passages,
write notes in its own margins in pencil in case it ever wants to erase,
mark archaic phrasings for googling later.

A brain is impulsive.
A brain thinks different things on different days.
A brain thinks too highly of itself.
A brain thinks too lowly of itself.
A brain thinks too much.
A brain thinks too little.

In short,
a brain has troubles answering questions
about itself
even though it really likes thinking about itself,
but sometimes it just doesn’t get very far
on its own self-assessment because
of the aforementioned.
And that’s why it takes
personality tests
in the first place.

What a vicious cycle.

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3 Responses to “Regular Poem: Personality tests”

  1. silverscreenings 9 April 2013 at 7:55 PM #

    I particularly love this:

    A brain can’t
    stop itself
    and stand
    outside itself
    with its hood open and
    jam a long screwdriver between a belt and a pulley,
    poke at a coupling with a ballpoint pen from its breast pocket,
    shine its flashlight on the radiator fluid reserve tank.

    Brilliant.

    • TheBestofAlexandra 10 April 2013 at 12:38 AM #

      Thanks! Cars and brains are two of my favorite things although I know very little about either.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Poem #5 – The Fog | Brighterdays Blog - 8 April 2013

    […] Regular Poem: Personality tests (thebestofalexandra.wordpress.com) […]

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