OUaT 2.7 Recap: When Wolves… And Wolves

19 Jan

Episode 7: Child of the Moon

Dwarves find fairy dust in the mine.  And by fairy dust they mean diamonds…?  Blue Fairy directs Charming to lock away The Hat because they’re gonna grind that stuff up, so he better keep the hat out of the wrong hands.  Chekhov’s Magic Hat?

“Thanks for saving me from that dude. I’m on my wolf period.”

At Granny’s, a dude flirts with Red, but she isn’t in the mood, and Belle saves her from it.  Red says it’s complicated and looks at the clock ominously.

Charming and Henry talk about Henry’s nightmares (which he’s sharing with Sleeping Beauty).

King Dad Attorney comes to “congratulate” Charming on finding the fairy dust, but really he’s gonna try to run the town in an ominous fashion.  Where’s Regina to run the town?!  Girl, if you’re not in this episode, I’m boycotting this show.

Back at Granny’s, Granny and Red are hard at work making the freezer into a cage so that when Red turns into a werewolf she won’t eat anybody.  She explains that the red hood that kept her from changing must not have come through The Curse.  Plus, she’s worried about the amplitude of her Wolf’s Time since she hasn’t turned in 28 years.  Word.  Very responsible werewolf.

“Whatdya mean you might kill somebody? I’ve never heard of a werewolf killing anybody!”

Meanwhile, Charming’s there listening to all this and telling her she doesn’t need to build the cage and that she won’t hurt anybody.  Honey, you’re super good looking, but you’re not real smart, are you?  Chica accidentally killed her true love once.  Let the girl do what she gotta do!

Fairy Tale Flashback: Red and Snow run through the forest, and Red suggests they split up because her hood is torn, and she doesn’t know if it will work if it’s not in excellent condition.  Snow declines and further suggests shacking up together in the woods somewhere.  A dude with crazy eyes looks at them from a distance away.

Granny’s in the morning:  Ruby escaped!!!!!!

There’s Henry’s dream.  What is this?  BSG?  Shared prophetic dreams?  Where’s President Roslin in a bad wig saving the half-cylon baby?

Regina’s there when he wakes up because Charming asked Regina to look after him.  Um… This is sweet, but since when are they friends?  Since she used magic to subdue a zombie?  BTW, Henry has a real-life burn from the dream fire.

Fairy Tale Flashback:  Ruby’s in the forest asleep.  She wakes up and rinses her hands in a river or something.  Creepy Eyes Dude steals her red cloak.  Fairytale land Ruby is kinda whiny, but I love her.

Creepy Eyes reveals he’s also a wolf and that he smelled her.  He wants to teach her how to be a nice wolf and leads her through a door in the forest floor, which leads to some underground sexy lair with a bunch of other sexy wolf-people.  Why is everyone on this show so good looking?!

Where do they even find all these dreamy people?

Anita appears.  She’s the den mother, I guess?  Oh, and also Anita’s Red’s mom, duh.  She thought her mom was killed by hunters!

Back in ME:  Charming gets called out to where a tow truck is double-parked.  Turns out Flirty Dude from Granny’s is dead.  Red thinks she did it!

Regina calls Gold to tell him about the nightmares Henry’s having.  During this phone call, she gives us some exposition:  It’s a side effect of the sleeping curse because during the curse, the soul travels to a nether world.  Gold decides to give him a potion that will help him control the journey into this other world.  Gold gives him this for free, as opposed to most other times he gives people pricey magic.

Charming and Red talk about her maybe killing some people.

Fairy Tale Flashback:  Anita and Red talk.  Turns out, Granny stole Red from her parents because she thought the wolf is something to be ashamed of.  The only way to control the wolf is to accept it as a part of yourself, apparently.  She encourages Red to get rid of the red cloak.  I don’t trust you, Anita.  If you’re a wolf, shouldn’t you be able to just steal your baby back?

Back in ME:  King Dad DA comes in to antagonize Charming and accuses him of putting the town’s lives in danger because he doesn’t lock up his friend Red.  DA King Dad tryna turn the town against him.  But he already has her locked up on suspicion of murder.  What more would the town want?  Her head on a stick?

Fairy Tale Flashback:  A lot of CGI wolves running through the forest.  Wait, I’ve seen this episode of Xena, too.  Mama Wolf is trying to teach Red how to be the wolf by giving in or whatever.

“Hey! I didn’t get a harumph outta that guy!”

The DA King Dad is working the extras into a froth outside the police station, demanding Red’s head on a stick.

WTF is this outfit, Belle?

Meanwhile, Red is being chained up in the library on suspicion of murder kinda so the angry mob outside of the police station can’t get her.  What is Belle wearing?!  Awful!  Beauty and the Beast!  Always!

Fairy Tale Flash Back:  Snow White shows up to the Sexy Wolf Lair, and Dude Wolf tries to kill her.  Snow White still wants to find a cabin somewhere.  Red wants to stay.  This is a touching break up scene before the Queen’s men (who’ve followed Snow there) come in and kill Dude Wolf.

Back in ME:  Chained up Red talks to Belle, who tries to comfort her.  Red says,

Everyone in this town is right to be afraid of me.

And she’s right, of course.  Tragic heroine!  Favorite character!

Meanwhile, Granny (who still has some wolf senses even after wolf menopause) is sniffing out some stuff with Charming, looking for evidence that will exonerate Red.  They find a hatchet and the red hood in a trunk.  They also find a piece of paper that says it was DA King Dad who orchestrated this by breaking the car window.  Good police work…?  IDK what this paper is, and IDK why DA King Dad would write his name on evidence…?

Fairy Tale Flashback:  Anita accuses Snow of killing Dude Wolf.  They will tie her up and eat her because humans are bad.  Errbody got an evil mom up in here.

And that’s why you don’t have spikes sticking out of the floor in your Sexy Wolf Lair.

Red, upset that her mom just threatened to horrifically murder her best friend, tries to defend Snow by pushing Anita out of the way, but Anita falls on a spike and dies.  Whoa!  TRAGIC HEROINE!!!!

Back in ME:  The mob is looking for Red, who is howling at the moon a lot and approaching growlingly–I guess Belle let her out?  Granny crossbows the gun out of the King’s hand while Charming reasons with the crowd.  He approaches carefully and talks her out of being wolfish.  He puts the cloak on her to turn her back.

And the DA King Dad has run off.

Charming, Red, and Granny find him by a fire.  He says,

I just want to see the look on your face when you realize you’ll never see your loved ones again.

He burns the hat.  Why doesn’t anybody have good parents in this show?

Fairy Tale Flashback:  Snow and Red are having a wolf funeral for Anita, and Snow is sad and apologetic about Red’s loss, but Red assures her that she protected her family today.  They hug, and Red explains that everybody wants her to choose either wolf or human, but Snow lets her be both.  Dawww!  Maybe they will get a cabin together.  And maybe a couple cats, and one of them will teach piano lessons… Oh wait, they end up in Maine.

Back in ME:  Red is trying to encourage Charming that they’ll find their mutual family, and she goes off without her cloak to be a wolf and free.

Present-day Fairy Tale Land: Sleeping Beauty is having her nightmare, and Henry has control.  Henry tells her not be scared.

Notes:

  • Red is officially my second-favorite character.   She’s very responsible and conflicted and tragic and hopeful.  She’s probably killed as many people as Regina, but she didn’t mean to, so it’s ok…?
  • So, everybody wants Red to be one thing or another, and Snow lets her be both.  Does Regina have somebody who will let her be both magicized and good?  Will Henry be that for her one day?
  • Charming is not very impressive as sheriff.  I liked him in fairy tale land badassing around, but in Maine maybe he’s got some residual David douchiness.  He was an idiot during this entire episode, and he only ever accidentally found any evidence.
  • Once again, Henry comes out as the smartest character.  Vote Henry Mills for mayor, everybody.  I’m serious.
  • This show has the best looking cast on television.  Except for that one little misstep with Hipster McNasty.  Oh man, even one-episode werewolves are just dreamy as all get out.
  • Belle is perpetually beauty to whatever beast is around, isn’t she?
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